Can We Talk?
“If you want to make peace with your enemy, you have to work with your enemy. Then he becomes your partner.” — Nelson Mandela
What do you believe? Is it true?
In an effort to examine her belief systems and better understand what divides us, Rachel Pickett has taken to the road to talk to people across the country.
According to her blog, where she chronicles her journey, some of the states she’s visited since leaving her home in Oakland California on August 1st include Arizona, Texas, Kansas, Ohio, and West Virginia. I met up with her and her current traveling companion, Andrew Dunlap, on the front steps of the Floyd County Courthouse to find out more about what she calls “The Summer Inquiry Project.”
Although Rachel’s last name is Pickett, she’s not protesting anything. She’s only asking the question. “Want to Talk about Politics?” her sign reads.
“I kept thinking people should be doing something to heal the political diviisions in our country. But then I thought, Maybe I should be doing that. What could I do to help heal the divide?” she wondered.
Do people actually stop to talk politics with a stranger? “What’s the ratio of people who stop to talk and those who walk by?” I asked.
“About 80% look and 20% stop to talk,” she answered.
“Have you had any negative feedback?” I continued.
“Not once we start talking,” she answered. The majority of people have been friendly. Some have bought her lunch or offered her a place to stay. About the worst thing that has happened since the start of the trip is that someone rode by on a bicycle and said “Not with you,” in answer to the question on her sign, Rachel told me. One unlikely positive interaction happened at a KKK parade. Rachel’s interest in learning what motivates beliefs allowed her to approach a KKK supporter and pursue what turned out to be a meaningful exchange.
Inviting conversation, rather than trying to change minds, in the hope of finding common ground is the theme of the Inquiry Project, which was inspired by the work of best selling author Byron Katie. Katie, referred to as “a visionary for the new millennium,” in a Time Magazine profile, has devised a series of 4 questions designed to invite a deeper exploration into beliefs.
“That’s Dunlap with an a” Andrew (on the left) said when he saw that I had misspelled his name in my notepad. He isn’t the only Inquiry Project activist who has accompanied Rachel on her journey. When Rachel was in West Virginia her mother took part in the initiative. Before that it was an Aunt in Kansas who held the sign asking “Want to Talk about Politics?”
Talking politics can be a tricky proposition, one that often causes people to get heated, which is exactly why it’s a good place to begin developing listening and conflict resolution skills, Rachel thinks.
Both she and Andrew are working towards their master’s degrees in social work, and Rachel plans to work in education after graduation, perhaps designing school curriculums for practicing conflict resolution. She’s also recorded some Summer Inquiry Project interviews that she hopes to develop into a documentary. Some of the interview questions she posed included “Do you think there’s a political divide in this country? If so, how does it get there? What might work to bridge it?
“What next?” I asked when I learned they would be leaving Floyd that day.
“A couple of cities in South Carolina, Birmingham, New Orleans, and Austin,” she rattled off.
By now several passer-bys were craning their necks in our direction. I didn’t want to monopolize the possibility for Rachel and Andrew to bridge more divides and strengthen common ground with others. She had told me that many of their inquiry interactions ended with a sharing of email addresses and other contact information. I was no different. After giving her my email address, I wished them good luck, and thanked them for caring.
Walking to my car, I felt a sense of encouragement and thought to myself, “How easily new friends are made.”
August 16th, 2006 2:30 am
For several years I lived next door to a woman whose views differed from mine both politically and religiously. But she’d come over for coffee and we’d talk, and talk, and find common ground among our differences. She became a dear friend. I think what Rachel’s doing is wonderful.
August 16th, 2006 8:20 am
Now that’s putting your money where your mouth is! She is to be admired for her efforts.
August 16th, 2006 8:27 am
Haven’t been to Harvest Moon. I will have to google it. Sounds like something I would like.
Politics. Ek. I talk about them way more than I should.
🙂
August 16th, 2006 8:51 am
Everytime I write a political commentary I keep my mother in mind who likes President Bush, while I happen to think he’s the worst President in history. I imagine I’m talking to her. It helps me write something that I think has a better chance of being heard as opposed to something that is just reacted to.
August 16th, 2006 9:46 am
Love that quote. And, this is such an awesome idea and for her to follow thru is so cool.
Maybe by starting to listen to one another we can see how much we have in common and our differences are minimual.
August 16th, 2006 12:52 pm
Wow – made me think of Peace Pilgrim who walked all over the country; more than 25 thousand miles walking her talk. She was often given shelter and food too.
She said, “This is the way of peace: overcome evil with good,
and falsehood with truth, and hatred with love.”
See here.
August 16th, 2006 1:02 pm
I told them they reminded me of the Peace Pilgrim and Rachel said, “yeah, but we’re in a car.” I also told her about the history of vigils held in the very same site they were inhabiting. I keep wanting to come up for a word for what they were doing. Talking? Sitting? But it’s more than that. Any ideas?
August 16th, 2006 1:47 pm
Very interesting blog. I feel that, unfortunately, many political beliefs are so deep-rooted it leaves little possibility for change. But Rachel has a great concept going here. It’ll be interesting to hear about the end result.
August 16th, 2006 3:50 pm
Interesting. I’m a firm believer that just talking with someone who has different opinions is a political act itself.
August 16th, 2006 4:43 pm
I agree, Neil.
Thanks for your comment, Terri. From what I gathered by talking to Rachel and reading her site, the project is not about changing minds, but agreeing to disagree and then finding some common ground in spite of disgreeing. Your commment prompted me to add a line to clarify that.
August 16th, 2006 6:15 pm
I think that our present political shenanigans are the worst that I’ve seen in my 73 years…but I also know that it can only be improved by bringing it all out in the open. I commend these young people and I, too, remember Peace Pilgrim and her quest. Let’s get our heads out of the sand and participate !!
August 16th, 2006 7:57 pm
This is an important little exercise. We need to engage in the center in this country. After a month devote to campaigning for John Kerry and the horrible feeling at the end of it all, I realized something very important—that polarization is a form of violence, and a very seductive one. It sucks you right in. I think you read my post called “The Plot Against America,” about how I felt about the left pushing to the extreme after the Connecticut election. I’ve added a few comments of my own to that one. There is a lot of conflict inherent in my refusal to march in lockstep on the far left, because I’m a lifelong lefty. But it’s good conflict. Third party, anyone?
I wish these folks luck and success.
August 16th, 2006 9:36 pm
Isn’t it nice to see someone actually doing SOMETHING?…no matter how small we can all make a difference. It is refreshing to see someone take initiative…I like them both. Are they headed our way? (I feel the guilt spread as I am aware I have done nothing!)
Best of luck to them both and it is nice to see someone who really cares!
August 17th, 2006 4:02 am
What a wonderful idea this is and how terrific that Rachel P. is actually doing this trip all over, herself! It sounds like it was great fun to meet her and talk to her, too, Colleen. Thanks for sharing this because otherwise I would never have known about it, at all!
August 17th, 2006 7:41 am
I particularly like the “agree to disagree” approach. I generally watch the Jim Lehrer News Hour on PBS nightly and they often have guests representing both sides of an issue. If the two sides are divisive and confrontational my brain just automatically disengages and I hear little they have to say. On the contrary, when the debate is reasonable and courteous I find myself learning and understanding the issues better from both perspectives, thus helping me make a better decision for myself and maintain some measure of respect for the opposite view.
August 17th, 2006 9:13 am
That’s a good point, Alan. I love to watch David Brooks and Mark Sheilds sum up the week on the PBS News Hour. The are friendly, both smart, and not afraid to say when their “side” is misguided.
Rick, I have mixed feeling about Lieberman being ousted. I think it’s just part of the pendulum swing when members of the left start to walk around with their tail between their legs, like some did when they voted for the war resolution. On the whole, it does send a message and might shift others to be less afraid to press to hold Bush accountable for getting us in Iraq under false pretenses etc.
August 17th, 2006 1:20 pm
wow how brilliant. i love it. thanks for posting about this.
August 17th, 2006 7:29 pm
Finally! It is so refreshing to read about a couple that is looking for what could be a solution to that long standing taboo: politics!
what a great post, Colleen. I’m so glad you took the time to interview them and share what you learned.
August 18th, 2006 11:54 am
I don’t see these kids as doing anything other than taking a vacation that is also providing some material for their sociology studies. Solving the world’s problems they ain’t. I also bet they didn’t get much response from the natives of southwest VA given the independent yet private nature of the people.
Politics. Compromise. Who wants to compromise on their ideas and beliefs? No thanks. Compromise is what the losing side, the left, advocates so they can garner some of the resources they would have had if they had won.
I think politics are private because nobody wants to be judged for their positions.