My Journal
I believe in the blue bird of happiness, which is why my journal has a picture of one glued to the inside cover. My latest journal is three years old. It’s fraying at the edges, putting on some pounds around the middle from me stuffing it full of ink marks, scraps of paper between pages, glue stuck typed poems, words highlighted in neon yellow, themes marked with stars, and arrows pointing to what’s important.
I hate to start a new journal. It’s like being forced to get a new husband when you still like your old one, or moving to a new house and you have to lug all your old stuff over to the new place and set it up.
I like a lived-in journal where I know my way around. The Van Gogh Starry Night cover on mine makes me feel right at home. When I open it, it’s like opening a favorite kitchen junk drawer that holds everything I might possibly need. It’s messy but I have a sense of where everything is: Life formulas, quotes, things to do lists, my husband’s pant size, pressed aspen leaves from Colorado, my favorite Richard Brautigan poem, tarot readings, phone numbers, ideas to patent, directions to the nearest hot springs, things I want for Christmas next year, things I did today, and names of books I still haven’t read.
My journal serves as my memory. It holds my place while I’m busy doing other things. I often bring it into restaurants and write in it while I’m waiting for my order to arrive. Once I brought my journal into Applebee’s and then mistakenly left it there when I left. Later, when I discovered it was missing, I frantically drove back to get it and was happy to find it still there. But I was surprised to see it on the floor. Someone had wedged it under a table leg to steady a wobbly table.
Once, my mother said to me, “If there’s one thing I regret, it’s that I didn’t keep a journal, that I didn’t write something down everyday.” After that, I tried to write in mine more often, and I tried very hard to make my handwriting more readable.
I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train. ~ Oscar Wilde
Photo: The sticker in the photo is from a Foster Care Provider Regional Conference in which I was honored for passing the 5 year of service mark.
January 13th, 2007 6:21 pm
I kept a hand written journal during a critical part of my life not too long ago. I have also kept one on an as needed basis on and off although, much to my dismay, I have no idea where they are anymore.
My blogging serves this purpose to a certain extent, although my hand written notebooks are far less formal and much more personal.
How’s that for not-spam!
Credit goes to, of course, Michele.
Mike
January 13th, 2007 6:27 pm
Hi Collen. Saw your sad note over at Michelle’s. You were lucky to find your journal. I wish I had kept one as my blog is my life story and I have to rely on memory and old photos. Not so easy when you are as old as I am:)
January 13th, 2007 6:30 pm
Well, I hope these aren’t sympathy comments! Thanks, guys.
January 13th, 2007 6:57 pm
I keep a handwritten journal for when I don’t have my computer (often taking it on hiking trips, etc). I’ve got five of these bound “trip journals” and another seven large notebook journals where I file my printed journal entries, these journals go back to the late 70s.
January 13th, 2007 10:58 pm
I’ve had so many journals over the years that never have more than half the pages filled. I don’t like going back and rereading them because they make me uncomfortable (I really thought/felt/said that?!), but I haven’t tossed any. I haven’t. My ex-husband did, though only because he though it was a box of trash because I left it in the wrong place.
Most of the journals I’ve started in recent years are more lists and notes to myself rather than diary type entries. I’m not even so great at keeping a blog. I don’t know what happened to the journaler I used to be.
January 13th, 2007 11:44 pm
I know I should be keeping a journal. I should have started on when my first son was born. It seems a little too late to start now, though. I hope you fins a journal so nice that you won’t mind leaving the older one.
January 14th, 2007 2:09 am
Love that Wilde quote–and your sky blue journal is beautiful!
January 14th, 2007 10:05 am
In many ways my blog has become my journal. I now have two binders,each for one year of blogging. I print out my posts, do the three hole punch thing and stick them in the binder for that year. I am hoping that maybe someday my kids and grandkids will take a look and be happy learn a little more about me.
January 14th, 2007 10:08 am
I love to go back and read my high school and young adult journals…how different I was then. I use my blog to journal now but if computers are destroyed or obsolete in the future only books like yours will remain. Your writing of having to leave yours makes me a bit sad…sorry you have to start all over. I hope you can find one you bond to as well as you did this one.
January 14th, 2007 12:17 pm
I write less and less in my journal for the same reason. Blogging has taken its place. I also print out each entry. When they acculmulate, I put them in plastic storage bags so that they will last longer, like a time capsule for the future. For blogging I tend to use “working journals” which consist of compostion notebooks full of scribble.
January 14th, 2007 4:19 pm
I have so many journals…three going right now…because they are topical, sort of. Sometimes I think it would be best to only use one.
Susan
January 14th, 2007 4:57 pm
It does become comfortable, all broken-in….just like a husband! HA! HA! (couldn’t resist that! I loved your comparison!)
January 14th, 2007 9:53 pm
I can strongly relate to this, although I enjoy starting a new notebook. I also type my entries (on an irregular basis), so that I can use the search function to find things.
January 14th, 2007 10:47 pm
Paper brings the comfort of home. I have never succeeded in keeping a paper-based journal. I lose stuff too easily.
But online…that’s another story. I guess my blog stands as my first serious success in self-recording.
January 15th, 2007 9:52 am
It’s a mixed blessing to finally need another journal. So hard to decide which design to pick next and what customization to do.
January 16th, 2007 6:35 am
I envy your journal-keeping, I have never done this, or really wanted to, being protective of my thoughts and not wanting to share. But I find my blogging very liberating, and I can open up a bit (if I can remember not to worry about who might read it).