The Final Leaving: How to
Pack it up
Sell off the parts
Let it drop
Become a disembodied name
that slips the mind
Fall out of character
Start at the end
and take a number
Walk through walls
or walk on water
Become the air
for others to breathe
A memory that floats
like a fragrance
_____Colleen Redman / Poets and Storytellers United / dVerse Poets Pub
March 18th, 2022 11:32 am
Become the air
for others to breathe
The eventual existence of the post=pandemic era. One makes sacrifices to ensure clean living in a community. Love the contention of advancement of good community relationships
Hank
March 18th, 2022 11:50 am
Poignant! You left a sweet fragrance with this poem, Colleen.
March 18th, 2022 12:17 pm
A thought-provoking write! I simply hope folks remember me …. cheers to you on this Friday.
March 18th, 2022 3:38 pm
Great stuff, CR; I esp dug final quat. Thanks
March 18th, 2022 4:27 pm
You make it sound almost enticing! I must say, I’m not in any hurry – but then, your poem feels quite leisurely. I do love, in particular, your last verse.
March 18th, 2022 7:22 pm
Become the air
for others to breathe
The eventual existence of the post-pandemic era. One makes sacrifices to ensure clean living in a community. Love the contention of advancement of good community relationships
Hank
March 18th, 2022 7:28 pm
Become the air, there is a sense of cleansing in your words.
March 19th, 2022 3:23 am
Real poetry….superb tone…..so cleverly done, very sharp….I do like that “sardonic” walk on water, and take a number…
March 19th, 2022 10:59 am
I like the idea of becoming air for someone else to breathe. I think we live on after death in ways that we can barely imagine. Breath is one of them.
March 19th, 2022 11:57 am
Some days, it seems that falling out of character is the only way to stay in character. I also love the idea of becoming someone else’s breath. Reaching that level of lightness implies a good thing for everyone involved.
March 19th, 2022 5:34 pm
Oh to be a pleasant and haunting fragrance!
March 20th, 2022 3:19 am
So profoundly simple, when all is said and done!
March 20th, 2022 8:56 am
The first thought I had after reading your poem is “If only”…. “If only, one could become a fragrant memory…”
March 20th, 2022 1:08 pm
I wonder also how to be remembered… maybe as a flower where my ashes are spilled.
March 20th, 2022 4:29 pm
A memory that floats like a fragrance….sounds wonderful.
March 21st, 2022 11:58 am
“A memory that floats like a fragrance.” A lovely last line to all the sensory elements of this poem. Enjoyed this, Colleen.
March 22nd, 2022 1:31 pm
“A memory that floats like a fragrance.” I hope mine would be well received.
I wonder what fragrance I would leave behind, sweet flowering fields or pungent skunk defenses.
March 24th, 2022 11:35 pm
A few days before the Husband’s dad died, he told us that he was going to walk through the hospital walls when it was time.