A Monk Swimming
After revealing some of the stupidest things I’ve done in my August 1st post, some members of The Love-Link, an email group I belong to, came forward with some of their own “stupid things.” Most were related to mishearing, like this one that my niece, Chrissie, shared:
She and her boyfriend recently went to a Red Sox game. There, the fans begin to cheer for one of their favorite players, Manny Ramirez. “We want Manny…We want Manny,” they roared. But Chrissie and her boyfriend are both from Virginia and not so in “the baseball know.” They thought the crowd was yelling “We want candy.” So they joined in the wild chanting with “We want candy…We want candy!” When someone later questioned her as to why she thought the crowd would be yelling “we want candy” in the first place, she answered that she thought it was some kind of coded lingo for “We want a hit!”
More than one person on the Love Link admitted to thinking “wind chill factor” was actually a “windshield factor,” and when my sister Sherry was a girl she thought a line from a Beatle’s song “we all live in a yellow submarine” was “we all live in a jealous of marine.”
Malachy McCourt, the brother of Angela’s Ashes author, is the author of “A Monk Swims,” the title of which is based on his mishearing of the Catholic prayer, The Hail Mary.
As a child, I also misheard a line in that same prayer. If Malachy and I had our way, the Hail Mary would read like this:
Hail Mary full of grapes (grace)
The Lord is we thee
Blessed art thou
A monk swimming (amongst women)…
Have you heard any stupid things wrong lately?
August 7th, 2005 9:52 am
Oh my heavens! I was laughing so hard when I read that “Hail Mary.” I love mangled lyrics. LOL!!! *BTW* Hello, Michele sent me.
August 7th, 2005 9:53 am
My 4 year old gets things wrong all the time, and the thing is, she’ll debate you until you’re blue in the face over what the line is. Finally, we just say ‘okay, whatever, yep, that’s it’.
Michele sent me today.
August 7th, 2005 11:46 am
I get things wrong all the time. And once I get a song lyric wrong, it stays that way. Even when I know the right one! Michele sent me.
August 7th, 2005 12:20 pm
LOL. I used to think it was “our father, who AREN’T in heaven.” So I’d look for him all over the place cause according to the prayer, I thought he wasn’t supposed to be in heaven.
August 7th, 2005 3:59 pm
There are two really funny books of misheard song lyrics. One is called “He’s Got The Whole World In His Pants,” and the other is called, “Excuse Me While I Kiss This Guy.” Both are hysterical, especially when you read some of the mishearings of the Ramones’ “I Wanna Be Sedated”….. “I want a piece of date bread!”
August 7th, 2005 4:06 pm
I don’t know if I should be saying this….but my daughter Heather…thought nylons were nylongs!!!!! Maybe we are all hard of hearing. I really like the “Our Father who AREN’T in heaven…..it made me laugh!!
August 7th, 2005 4:45 pm
LOL, those are so cute.
I can’t recall misheard offhand but remember my mom’s tense look whenever I belted out the biology song of “Snakes Crawl at Night”, actually about a crime of passion double-murder.
August 7th, 2005 6:12 pm
lol.. I have abad habbit of saying HUH? even though I heard someone loud and clear.. (mainly the hubby).. My daughter calls a hammer a hamera (like camera only with a h)
August 7th, 2005 11:37 pm
Reminds me of my mishearing of Little Mermaid:
“Pregnant women, sick of swimmin’, ready to stand!”
(It’s “bright young women”. I thought Ariel had a secret.)
August 8th, 2005 4:13 am
Following up on Jeanne’s note — There is a website called Kiss This Guy at http://www.kissthisguy.com/ based on the misheard Jimi Hendrix lyrics from “Purple Haze.” It is hilarious.
There’s also the story of the little girl who looked forward to going to church because everybody there sang about Gladly, the Cross-Eyed Bear.
August 8th, 2005 9:45 am
Did I mention you are what I want to be when I grow up???;0) I’ve just caught up on everything..my computer went whacko about Wed so I was disconnected!!! I’ll do the meme sometime in the next two weeks…I’m off to MI on Thurs for 5 days. The Floyd fest sounds wonderful!!! And Floyd sounds like the epitamy of where I want to live when I have my days to myself again. I’ve finished both your books and they made me laugh, and cry sometimes at the same time! I’m going to lend them to Momma K when she gets back from her vacation. Sounds like your 3 weeks sabatacle was a refreshing one!! What a talent you are Colleen! I’m so glad I am able to get to know you ;0) I’m jumping around, I know, but I think it would be great if you jumped up on stage and asked about bloggers!!! Brave women you! Later girl!
August 8th, 2005 9:45 am
Did I mention you are what I want to be when I grow up???;0) I’ve just caught up on everything..my computer went whacko about Wed so I was disconnected!!! I’ll do the meme sometime in the next two weeks…I’m off to MI on Thurs for 5 days. The Floyd fest sounds wonderful!!! And Floyd sounds like the epitamy of where I want to live when I have my days to myself again. I’ve finished both your books and they made me laugh, and cry sometimes at the same time! I’m going to lend them to Momma K when she gets back from her vacation. Sounds like your 3 weeks sabatacle was a refreshing one!! What a talent you are Colleen! I’m so glad I am able to get to know you ;0) I’m jumping around, I know, but I think it would be great if you jumped up on stage and asked about bloggers!!! Brave women you! Later girl!
August 8th, 2005 2:01 pm
There’s classic Manfred Mann:
“Blinded by the light
revved up like a deuce
Another runner in the night”
I think we all know what we thought we heard instead of “duece”!
August 8th, 2005 3:50 pm
I agree with Annie … that’s exactly what I always heard in that song!
Getting away from song lyrics for a moment … one precious memory I have of a deceased friend … we worked together many years ago as clerks and when she took a phone message one day and passed it on to me, it read as follows:
“Robert Smith – needs to contact Susan about the note of republic.” Of course, it only took me a moment to realize she was trying to write “notary public” but was unfamiliar with the term.
Thought you might like that one.
August 9th, 2005 7:58 am
Re: “Blinded by the Light” – my husband still refuses to believe that that word is “deuce.” He’s convinced it’s what we all mis-hear it as. I’ve shown him the lyrics a million times and he still doesn’t buy it.