Man with Beard
A frequent Scrabble partner and member of my Writer’s Workshop who I was barred from naming on my blog, passed away Thursday morning. Although he suffered from numerous health complications, his death still came as a shock. His name was written on my calendar, expected to come to dinner on Sunday. His write-up about our Spoken Word Open Mic on Saturday appeared in “The Floyd Press” on the same morning he died, and a friend I ran into the night before asked how his mood had been lately.
A group of us expected him for a Scrabble game last Sunday, but he never showed up. “Too tired,” he later said. Was his no-show a sign of what was coming? I didn’t think so because I knew he was up late the night before at the local Contra Dance. It had been a while since he was able to dance himself, but he remained involved by making himself a familiar fixture selling tickets at “The Winter Sun” stage door.
Even though his health was compromised and he was frequently in a lot of pain, I don’t think he was finished with life. He was actively working to complete a first collection of poetry that he wanted to leave behind. Although he wasn’t finished with it, he had made great strides in telling his story through his poems. In the past couple of years at local Spoken Word venues, he read his deeply personal, sometimes daring, and often disturbing poems about child abuse, the death of a loved one, the sting of being laughed at for being disabled, and the frustration of being at the mercy of the medical establishment. His poetry also dealt with themes of loneliness and lust.
Although he was leery of computers and often made snide remarks about the time I spend on one, he had plans to take a class at Floyd’s newly forming Adult Education Computer Lab in preparation for finishing his poetry collection. His aversion to computers, coupled with the fact that he was going learn to use one, is only one of the paradoxes he embodied. But it was the internet he was suspicious of, not the computer in general, I can almost hear him correcting me. Yes, even his paradoxes had reasoning.
Tonight’s Spoken Word Open Mic at Café Del Sol, of which the bearded man frequently MC’d, will go on as scheduled but will not be the same. His poetry will be read by friends, others will read pieces they have written about him. I don’t expect to hear flowery tributes, as his manner and the life he led was anything but. I expect memorializing him will be done with hard facts delivered with an efficiency of language and seasoned with an ironic sense of play. Just like the man… and poetry he wrote.
Post Note: Bloggers and fellow Floyd Writers’ Circle members, Doug at Blue Ridge Muse and Fred at Fragments from Floyd have also written about the bearded man’s passing.
November 19th, 2005 11:38 am
Your title caught my attention (as I scratch my beard), but as I read, I was struck by a sadness of someone who appears to have loved life even though he drew a hard lot…
Do you know the poetry of Craig Romkema (Embracing the Sky: Poems beyond disability)? It’s been nearly two years since I read it–but I pulled off my shelves after reading your post–the picture on the cover–the sunsetting behind a tree–reminds me of my post of yesterday.
Remember the Bearded Man. Maybe you and his other friends should pull together his work and publish a chapbook as a tribute.
November 19th, 2005 12:15 pm
Sorry for the loss of your friend.
November 19th, 2005 12:22 pm
There are plans for a chapbook of Elliot’s poetry as well as a literary prize of some sort at some point. Besides the Spoken Word gathering tonight (in which his poems and works recently written about him will be read), there will be a memorial cemermony at the next Floyd Contra Dance on December 10th. Contra Dancing and poetry were his 2 biggest loves and I’m sure he would be pleased.
Thanks for the tip on the poetry of Craig Romkema, Sage. I’ll look into it.
November 19th, 2005 8:40 pm
I am so sorry to learn of the loss of your friend. Please accept my sympathies.
November 19th, 2005 8:42 pm
I am truly sorry about the death of your friend. He also left a large part of im with you guys.
What a great monument to him!
Maggie
November 19th, 2005 9:11 pm
I am sorry to hear about Elliot’s death — it’s good the community is memorializing him….
November 19th, 2005 11:52 pm
So sorry to hear of your friend’s death. Death, expected or not, is always a shock to those left behind. My thoughts are with you.
November 20th, 2005 11:04 am
What a nice tribute. I can’t believe how much illness and death surround us now. Maybe it is just now hitting me harder than usual but there seems to be so much illness in my own circle, especially cancer. You seem to have had more than your share lately too. How precious is this life we are given. We aren’t promised one more second so we better live in joy and especially, in love.
November 20th, 2005 12:58 pm
Coleen, I’m so very sorry that you have lost your friend…He sounds like a fascinating, complex and very interesting person…
November 20th, 2005 3:42 pm
I am also very sorry you lost a friend. And I am sorry I cannot find more words for you.
November 20th, 2005 4:24 pm
Colleen, I was so sorry to learn of your friend’s passing. I hope your memories of him bring you comfort.
November 21st, 2005 8:27 am
Sorry chicky. You’ll be in my prayers.