Power Corrupts
Today I turned a trick for a printer power cord, or at least that’s the way I felt after being on the phone with HP customer service for nearly an hour; after wading through confusing menus cheerily spoken by automated Stepford Wives; after using a magnifying glass to read and the then repeat a slew of numbers and letters from the a back of my printer to operators who couldn’t understand my accent any better than I could understand theirs; and after being sent back to the beginning more than once as if I was playing Shoots and Ladders and was losing.
I was twenty minutes into the ordeal when I was told that my warranty expired YESTERDAY.
“You’ve got to be kidding me?”
I couldn’t accept the “yesterday” part, knowing the cord burned up in a electrical fire a week ago, that local office supply stores didn’t carry a replacement, and that before the word “yesterday” was uttered HP phone representatives seemed happy to send me a new power cord – after they collected the appropriate number of digits, took my family history, and rerouted me a couple of times, of course.
I imagined myself throwing the phone across the room.
But I had too much time and aggravation already invested in the elusive power cord. I couldn’t bring myself to say “Thank you for your time” and slam the phone down, so I didn’t and was shuffled on to the next phone operator. I went from customer service to tech support to the parts department and even had a ticket number I was told to write down. I was on the verge of tears of frustration and then of relief when I was transferred to someone with an accent I could understand who said. “Don’t worry, Colleen. We will find a solution.”
“I feel like I’m in The Matrix. Please don’t disconnect me,” I pleaded, now forty minutes into the drama.
The new customer service operator was nice, but soon she discovered the word YESTERDAY in my file and even she wasn’t willing to send me a power cord under a one day expired warranty.
“It’s like life and death … one minute you’re alive and then … you’re warranty is dead,” she announced.
As I waited on hold to make my plea to the HP man upstairs, the supervisor of supervisors, I felt the pressure of being in a courtroom trying to establish my innocence while being guilty of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I considered hanging up, but for once the wait wasn’t too long. “Hello … This is … John White Collar,” the man on the other end said.
“Thank you for hearing my plea and for listening to my story,” I began in my own defense, emphasizing that I wanted him to consider that my warranty expired YESTERDAY. I pointed out that I could document that the power cord burned up last Monday.
Mr. John White Collar seemed to be following the rule that if I had made it as far as his desk I earned whatever it was I was requesting, no questions asked, not even a serial number was re-mentioned.
The power cord is on its way, but I still don’t feel satisfied. I should have thrown the phone when I had the chance and liberated myself from such a soul sucking activity. Either that or, for all my trouble, I should have asked for a whole new printer because chances are that the printer was fried in the surge that ignited the original cord. But there’s no way of testing the printer without a new power cord.
February 20th, 2008 2:38 am
Oh God! These are the nightmare conversations I absolutely dread! Besides the time it takes, the toll on ones life—I truly believe these kinds of things take years off your life—-Well, I am happy for you Colleen that at least you will be getting that damn cord! I pray the inside of the machine has NOT burned up, too! Feb. 19th Mercury was to start going “forward” again, having been in a retrograde for the last yhree weeks….(Communication sucks during these periods…) But it has been my experience that the day or two of the forward and thereafter, things are still dicey where communication is concerened!
Maybe by Thursday communication will smooth out! One can only hope! (lol)
February 20th, 2008 8:21 am
Oh my gosh. Those kind of conversations just make my blood pressure rise. At least you weren’t repeatedly disconnected! Well, I hope the cord works for you and the printer still works. At least the story would have a happy ending then!
February 20th, 2008 8:24 am
I think everyone reading your post today will relate to it. I certainly do. It just so happens that I was on the phone with DISH-TV yesterday – helping a not so tech-savvy friend with her TV’s strange behavior. I was connected to a foreign country rep and was getting nowhere fast when we were disconnected. I think she did it on purpose because she was stumped. Arrrgh!!! I call back and get a nice, clear and understandable young man. I say to him “you’re in Virginia, aren’t you?” Shocked, he replied “yes, but how did you know?” I then went on to tell him I live in Floyd and know the DISH-TV tech facility right there on I-81. I knew right from the get go that I had reached that facility because any time I do, my problem is solved quickly and without struggle. This time was no exception.
February 20th, 2008 8:27 am
PS: I hope you’re feeling better. You’ve had a time of it lately what with the fire, then your bad cold.
February 20th, 2008 9:25 am
Yes, it sounds all too familiar, I have been on the phone a lot recently with the health insurance recording. I think you should just go throw the phone anyway! At least you got what you wanted, I think, even though you now feel cheap and abused. Ah, progress, gotta love it!
February 20th, 2008 9:40 am
The cord was delivered overnight and came yesterday! But the printer does not work! I’m wondering whether I should call John White Collar. He gave me his personal number.
February 20th, 2008 10:09 am
Thats about how my day went yesterday on hold with time warner. It took an hour to resolve my (THEIR) problem!
February 20th, 2008 10:19 am
Oh, call him! He gave you his direct #? By all means, make him deliver more goods. You already put your time in!!
February 20th, 2008 10:30 am
I HATE having to call any of the big corporations…I think we children of the 60s should start a Revolution!!!
February 20th, 2008 12:15 pm
I agree!!!!…….YOU should Call him. He did give you his personal number and after all the time you spent on the phone yesterday, don’t you think so. All he can do is say no and then he might even say yes.
Thinking of you today and sending much LOVE!
February 20th, 2008 7:13 pm
So Oprah is right… always ask for what you want. Eventually, someone hears you. 🙂
~S
February 20th, 2008 9:39 pm
Sounds like the red pill/blue pill choice. You took the red pill and now the power cord will probably show that the printer doesn’t work. Then you’ll have to see the oracle to get the answer!!!
February 20th, 2008 10:34 pm
I feel for you…I don’t know how many times I’ve burned my ear holding onto the phone listening to muzak or the longest phone tree ever recorded. My favorite is when you get about 3 or 4 options down the line, realize you’ve got to go back, but there’s NO GOING BACK!! I’ve figured it out tho….corporate America thinks we will just give up and leave them alone. Good for you that you kept after them! Don’t give up and give ’em hell!
February 20th, 2008 11:11 pm
I agree with you that being on hold and having to go through a menu of options is “a soul sucking activity.”
I should have asked for a whole new printer because chances are that the printer was fried in the surge that ignited the original cord. But there’s no way of testing the printer without a new power cord. … The cord was delivered overnight and came yesterday! But the printer does not work! I’m wondering whether I should call John White Collar. He gave me his personal number.
Yes, yes, yes! You really must call John White Collar. Stick with him because he is now your best buddy. Call him repeatedly until your printer once again does what it’s supposed to do. Call him until you get satisfaction. After all, you nearly paid for this with your soul … being sucked into the telephone.
February 21st, 2008 11:08 am
They have built-in obsolesce pretty hard-wired these days so that machines suicide just before their allotted time.
February 21st, 2008 6:09 pm
this has happened to me so many times lately I cannot imagine some ceo thinking this is good for business??
write a poetry book put everything in it you’ve ever writtenand sell it to me- Nurse one excellent
February 21st, 2008 6:48 pm
Sandy, one book of poetry so far: http://silverandgold.swva.net/mlm_press.htm
February 22nd, 2008 10:52 pm
Funny the second to comment by Jane is all too close to home, since I work at the same facility she mentions!
I can not believe that HP was that strict about you being just one day out of warranty, I’m empowered to give in if a customer in need of a part is up to 2 weeks out of warranty.
Funny how different companies handle different customer service issues.
February 22nd, 2008 11:10 pm
It took me nearly an hour to get someone with that authority. I now have an HP “Case Manager” who seems willing to fairly manage my case, which means a new printer is said to be coming.
February 25th, 2008 5:11 pm
It was an HP printer that crashed our computer almost a week and a half ago. It’s not going to be re-installed.
You’re a far more patient woman than I’d be on the phone for that long. My hat’s off to you.